Dear Oprah

Karen Waldkirch — Sun, 14 Dec 2008 20:11:32 GMT

Dear Oprah,

I read the news today, oh girl! You’ve come out of the pantry and admitted to hitting the big 2-0-0. I’m sure that must have been a tough thing to do. You’ve always prided yourself on your healthy lifestyle, thanks, in part, to a stable of personal trainers and chefs. Despite the number of ads I see on the internet, those Acai Berries aren’t working all that well.

Here’s what I want to say to you: Girlfriend, welcome to the club.

No, I haven’t hit the big 2-0-0, but I’m definitely not going public with my digits! And when I talk about the club, it’s definitely not the Fight Club or the Country Club. It’s that sorority of WBWs, a.k.a. Women Battling Weight. Honey, I’ve been a member of this club forever. Even way back in my grade school years, I’d wake up before my family just for the opportunity to munch on chocolate chips while I watched morning cartoons.

High school is when I started my first official diet. That was the first 15 pounds that I lost. I’m certain they returned during my freshman year of college. Since then I’ve been on multiple diets, all of them successful, unless you’re counting whether or not I kept the weight off.

Through the years, I’ve been buddies with Jenny Craig (twice) and Weight Watchers. Between those three diet sessions, I’ve lost over 100 pounds. I haven’t gained it all back, but I’m nowhere near my dream goal weight. The only thing I’ve got working in my favor is a newfound addiction to tennis.

Here’s the thing, Oprah: People don’t love you because you’re skinny. They love you because you speak your mind and because some of your favorite things are food. I’d go so far as to say that they love you because you’re not skinny. We’ve got plenty of skinny celebrities. We need more real women with double-digit dress sizes.

I realize that our country has an obesity problem and we need to move more and watch less. But since you’re a role model to so many women, I wish you’d change the goal. Stop with the “big reveal” of the bikini body and put the emphasis on health, activity and muscle. If the focus is always on how you look and not how you feel, then no progress has been made.

Look, it’s gotta be tough to have the eyes of America on you every day. When I break up with my latest diet plan, it doesn’t end up in the tabloids. But remember when Jamie Lee Curtis went “unretouched” in that magazine feature? Brilliant. That hot new British singer Adele? Love that she’s not a twig. Queen Latifah? The girl’s got curves and beauty with no apologies.

We need more honesty and less airbrushing. We’re living in a High Definition world. Let’s change the perception of what we want to see and what is beautiful. Let’s finally accept the fact that along with different colors, we come in different sizes and that’s not always bad. You are one of the few people in the world with the power to make that happen.

Sincerely,

Karen

Driving Miss Cranky : Diets

Dear Oprah