When Andrew was diagnosed with cerebral palsy at 6 months of age, my range of emotions was vast. Grief - for him and me and the loss of our hopes and dreams. Anger - why us, why him? Guilt - what could I have done differently? There was also a very strong sense of determination on my part that regardless of what the doctors told me - I would give my baby the best and happiest childhood ever and help him reach his fullest potential above and beyond what the doctors told me.
Out of sheer love for my child - I began an attack - there's no better word for it - on his diagnosis. I did research and made milestone charts and graphs on what we needed to accomplish daily to help him reach those ever-looming milestones. There was lots of stretching and reaching. Hadn't rolled over yet? Out came that battery operated toy that bounced around to entice Andrew to roll. Say new words? Out came the apple sauce on his outer lips to get him to move that tongue and of course there was me chattering incessantly and reading aloud to increase his auditory language skills. He was a happy - giggly baby who didn't mind all of this work - it was a lot of hands on play and more attention and love than any baby could want or need. We exposed Andrew to as much of the world around him as possible through language, travel, lots of playtime with cousins and friends and lots of one on one play with me.
It has always been a reach for the stars - dream big type of mentality in our house and I only wish I had the book that I recently found to show me that my feelings were normal, to guide me and to confirm that I was doing the right thing. "Breakthrough Parenting For Children With Special Needs - Raising The Bar of Expectations" by Judy Winter, 2006, is the book I needed when Andrew was diagnosed and I recomend it for all parents of children with special needs. Judy Winter covers it all; the diagnosis, education/IEPs, family, expectations and advocacy. In particular, she encourages parents and educators to hold the bar high and to keep it there. She has loads of tips and resources and ideas for parents.
This is an empowering book that's relevant through all the ages of a child's life. Judy's blog is also one of my favorites - check it out. Judy's message and positive and productive mind set about raising a child with a disability is one to learn from and to emulate. We all want the best for our kids and what better gift to give them then to help them reach for the stars?
